The motto for the Relief Society of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints is "Charity never faileth." This is the organization of all adult women of the church.
This comes from the description of love or charity in 1 Corinthians 13:8. In some more modern translations of The Bible, Charity is translated as Love. How do we see this motto operating in our lives? I have seen it in so many ways this past year as I have been president of the organization in my ward at church.
We have had a few funerals and memorial services. That is to be expected in a congregation that includes a couple of nursing/retirement homes and with significant numbers of members well into their nineties. We pull together in these times to comfort and feed the living, and to remember the deceased. For each service, the women I work with have helped set up, provided food, and cleaned up when everything was done. Sometimes we were able to sit through the service, sometimes we were in the kitchen listening. In all cases, the service was done with love.
Visiting teachers in Relief Society are assigned to watch over every adult woman. In the best of cases, they become friends. A woman who encounters a challenge can call upon her visiting teacher to ask for assistance and knows that someone will help. If the need is greater than the visiting teacher can meet, she contacts me or one of my counselors to coordinate additional assistance. We have two women who coordinate a variety of compassionate services, from meals at the funerals, to meals or help in the home for those who are ill. I know we can call on almost anyone at church and, if they are able they will provide assistance.
In other cases, the women do not become friends, but even so, they still care for each other and meet the needs of the sisters they visit. We try to set it up so that everyone has two visiting teachers who visit together, but that is not always possible. In our congregation, there are over 160 women to visit, and there are about forty women who are available to visit. Some work so many hours, they can only visit one or two. Others have a little more flexibility. But, if they visit in pairs, that means twenty pairs to visit eight women each-that's a little overwhelming.
Many of the women we have stewardship to watch over no longer come to church. they have not disassociated themselves, but they no longer feel the need to attend. Some of them welcome visits, others do not. Those that do not have visiting teachers who send a note instead of visiting in person. Others have moved and are visited by friends or family through Facebook or by phone. My goal is that all of these women know that there is someone at church they could call upon if a need arose.
One aspect of my job as president is to try to search out the lost sheep-those who no longer join our fellowship but have not chosen to have their names removed from membership. I hope we can love them back into participating. We send birthday cards to everyone and when someone moves, they eventually are returned as unforwardable. then, I spend time online doing research to see if I can locate them. In the past year, I have been able to find new addresses for about twenty women. Since I use free resources, it takes about a year after they move before I can get an updated address. I am grateful for these various search engines that help me locate the lost sheep. If all of the visiting teachers could visit in person, this would be a lot easier. However, that is not always possible. I also ask our sister missionaries to visit some of the unknown each month. Sometimes they are welcomed, sometimes not. My goal is that everyone gets a live visit once or twice a year-even the half dozen who are not really receptive.
Charity is so much more than donating unwanted clothes or a few dollars to a good cause. Those new translations that call it love are correct. True charity is love as Christ loves us. As we grow closer to the Savior, we hope to grow more like him. Showing love as he does is one way to demonstrate that growth. I know this calling has helped me grow in love and service. I am grateful that we have an organization that tries to live the motto and looks to love. I am also grateful for a ward family in which to learn to better serve and love.
Greater love hath no man than that he lay down his life for another. Memorial Day in the US celebrates those that have paid that ultimate sacrifice that me may enjoy the freedoms and blessings of living here. The families that lost these love ones also made that ultimate sacrifice-their lives were forever changed.
Yesterday, I spoke at church on charity. I did not talk about charitable acts or contributions, but mostly on charity as an active form of love. In a variety of scriptures, we are promised many blessings and protection as we exercise charity or develop the pure love of Christ. One of the scriptural definitions of charity is the pure love of Christ.
When we are able to love others as Christ loves us, we are demonstrating His love. When we accept others, with their quirks and foibles, and can love them anyway, we are learning to love as He loves.
Those that have given their lives to allow us to live ours have demonstrated that charity. This includes soldiers, first responders, and others that lay down their lives to save others. Those attempting to help in Nepal after the disastrous earthquake are examples of that love. Those lost, such as the helicopter squad, paid the ultimate price for their service.
As we enjoy our freedoms, perhaps with parades, barbecues, or the 'unofficial' start to summer, let us remember and give thanks to those who have made this celebration possible. We are truly blessed by their love and sacrifice.
I have seen a number of wonderful news articles in the past week that show what we can learn from children. One was a great article from purpose fairy, 10 Valuable Life Lessons to Learn from Children.
A second article was from Today about a young man who stomped a message in the snow to cheer up his mother and others in a hospital. A third article from Forbes was about mindfulness. I think children are generally very mindful, very much in the moment. And a fourth, from the golf world about someone saying thank you. A fifth from Scottsdale Desert Mountain High School showed up after I started drafting this. This was about a student who inspired the attendees at a basketball game to get him put into the game.These show how children can really give us a great example.
Too often as we grow older, we get so caught up in our lives that we forget to enjoy them. The life lessons article recommends steps to reconnect with the joy in life that children frequently experience-unless we adults teach them not to do so. The mindfulness article suggests that we will find much more success in life is we are fully present and aware, much like children who are not caught in a rut, constantly examining and exploring our environment.
I love playing with the kids in the nursery. They are exploring how to play with the various toys we have and are learning what they like and do not like. I frequently get down on the floor and play too-with cars, blocks, balls, etc. I pretend to eat plastic food and we discuss what that food is and whether or not we like the real food. We have fun. It is frequently noisy and almost always messy. But we clean it up again when we're done. As the article on learning from children suggests, we often cuddle. If someone falls or gets a bump, there is a cuddle or a kiss to make it better. If someone is sad or upset, there is usually a hug or two to help, along with kind and understanding words.
Being fully present with children does not mean there are never problems. That would not cause the growth that we see as we and they learn to manage the environment. For example, a few weeks ago, we had one 2 year old who was acting out a bit. He had trouble with the other younger one there and was not very 'nice.' After a few incidents, we had a time out together. He sat on my lap as we just sat and tried to calm down a bit. There were not tears, but we could not play with the other child who was having fun with my assistant leader. Instead, we just sat and cuddled. Then he asked about a bulletin board border next to us that had children in all sorts of positions, including upside down. We ended up copying the positions. He loved being turned upside down going backwards in my arms. What he really needed that day, but had no way to express, was the physical attention and cuddling. Mommy has a 6 month old and while she spends lots of time with her boys, this one needed a little more physical attention than she has had available lately. I will make sure he gets more regular cuddling to help fill the gap until the baby is older.
Many of us operate by rote; we don't pay much attention to what is around us. We eat the same things, drive the same way to work, wear only a few things in our wardrobes, and watch the same shows. Have you ever arrived somewhere in the car and realized that you never paid any attention while driving? You don't know how you got there. I have heard that from many people. It is far better to pay attention, to notice things as we drive. Notice the other cars and drivers; notice the conditions; be fully present; be mindful. The drive will have more meaning and as we incorporate that attention, that increased meaning will spill over into all aspects of our lives.
The boy in the Today show segment was worried about his mother who had recently been diagnosed with cancer. He chose to do something about it. While doing so, he realized he could do something for others in the hospital as well. His actions in cheering up those patients and workers were because he was fully present. He was able to think consider how he might send a message and he did it. He did not just think about it.
The game with Desert Mountain shows that kids with asperger's can still influence and make friends in spite of the difficulty their situation causes. While the article is focused on the athlete, the audience is just as important. They reacted with love.
Today, we celebrate various aspects of love with Valentine's Day. I sent out as many valentines for today as I used to give to classmates when I was in elementary school. For years, only my husband, daughter and mother got valentines. However, as I have matured, I realized that there were many others in my life that I wanted to know I was thinking of them and loved them. I now send to my sisters, nieces, step-chldren, step-grandchildren, some friends, and the kids in the nursery as well as to mom, the pro, and my daughter. I do not send virtual cards, except to friends on Facebook, because getting a letter in the mail still makes people smile.
Celebrate Valentine's Day. Smile at someone. Share your love. Fully enjoy the day. Live it like a child.
